


Princess and Fool

by pinkevilbob



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Royalty, Canon-Typical Violence, F/M, Warning: Trent Ikithon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-07 23:26:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21225989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pinkevilbob/pseuds/pinkevilbob
Summary: In order to stop a war that's lasted decades, Princess Jester must marry one of the enemy mages. But is there more to her silent husband, Bren, than it seems?





	Princess and Fool

**Author's Note:**

> ...yes this is my second arranged marriage au... I write what I want.
> 
> Major warning here guys. This is my most violent fic, so don't expect it to be my usual low key violence. If violence is not your thing, skip this fic.

Princess Jester's hand shook as she signed the peace treaty, but a bright grin was on her face. She was the only one smiling at the signing. But that wasn't going to bring her down. Neither were her nerves or the impending sense of doom hanging over her.

"Now that that matter has been settled," a particularly stuffy diplomat from Nicodranas said, "it's time for the next matter of business." Jester's stomach soured. She knew how desperately peace was needed between the queendom of Nicodranas and the Rexxentrum empire. The war between the two had been going for as long as Jester could remember. But that didn't make this any easier. "The wedding ceremony will begin once the groom arrives."

Jester paled. "Wedding ceremony? Don't you mean engagement ceremony?" Things couldn't be happening so fast. There must have been more arrangements to be made, and she did not want to be married so soon.

An old man from Rexxentrum chuckled. No, an old mage Jester realized with dread as she saw the sigils and runes on his robe. His skin was like old yellowed parchment with big ugly liver spots on it, and he wore his white hair long despite balding on top. "You don't really think that we're going to postpone something of such great import? Besides," he said softly with a sneer, "I thought all princesses couldn't wait for their wedding day."

"Oh right. I'm super excited," Jester said with all the chipperness she could muster. The mages that ruled over Rexxentrum insisted that as one of the conditions for peace Princess Jester must marry one of their own. "It's just that my mom's not here." Just the thought of getting married without her mom there to see it made Jester want to cry.

"The Queen isn't required for the ceremony. All that is needed is the bride and the groom," the old mage said.

Jester's stomach sunk. She just hoped that her mom could forgive her. When Jester was a little girl, her mother would tell her all about the wonderful wedding she hoped for her to have and how proud she'd be of her little sapphire. But now her mother was going to miss it. "Is the groom even here?" Everyone Jester had seen from Rexxentrum was a gross old person. Jester was willing to do whatever it took to keep her home safe, but she was hoping to not have to marry someone with liver spots.

"He should already be here," the old mage grumbled.

Another mage approached him. "Master Ikithon, we found him. He was in the carriage."

Master Ikithon rolled his eyes but turned back to Jester. "Your wedding will begin shortly."

"Thank you," Jester said. All she wanted to do was run away and cry, but she had to be strong even if she was all alone in neutral territory. Jester was led away to a podium that would be used as a makeshift altar. A cleric dedicated to Erathis was already there looking over some religious scripture. It wasn't even a Traveler wedding. Tears welled up in Jester's eyes, but she blinked them away. She was not going to cry at her wedding.

There was a stir in the crowd as a tall young man entered the room. He was almost what Jester pictured when she thought of her groom to be. All dark and mysterious. The mage was well over a foot taller than her with slick black hair and cunning blue eyes. The only thing was that he was much more muscular than Jester had imagined, but maybe that wasn't such a bad thing. She could have fun with that.

He approached Master Ikithon and Jester finally noticed that he was pulling someone along by the hand. This man was much smaller and had bright coppery auburn hair. Master Ikithon took the red headed man and brought him to the altar. "Your groom."

Her groom wasn't what Jester had expected at all except for that he was pale and thin. He never looked her in the eye instead turning his attention to the ground. He wasn't short, but he could not be considered tall for a man. His hair was artfully pulled back into a ponytail with just the right amount of it hanging in his face. The purple coat he wore belonged in fashion prints and everything about him was perfectly stylish. All of it made him look more like a dress up doll than anything else. Around his neck, a necklace so tight it was practically a collar hung. It was made of black interconnecting metals that looked like one piece from a distance. The front of it was open with blue magical sparks dancing between the two ends.

Jester was mesmerized by it and started to reach for it. Lightning fast, her groom grabbed her wrist and looked up at her shaking his head. She gasped at the sight of him. He was beautiful. Soft, long eyelashes framed bright blue eyes. A small cleft divided his chin. There was something delicate about his features. But it was all diminished by the intense fear that covered his face. Her groom was terrified of her.

"I wouldn't touch that if I were you," Master Ikithon said. “It’s a dangerous little bauble.”

“What does it do?” Jester asked.

Her groom looked back down and pulled a book out his pocket. Master Ikithon plucked the book out of his hands with a scowl. “We understand that mages are not necessarily welcome in your kingdom so we took the liberty of turning his off for you.”

“Does it hurt?” Jester didn’t like the idea of marrying a mage, but she also didn’t like the idea of him being in pain because of her.

“Hardly even a tingle.” Master Ikithon smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Well, they’re both here. Let’s get this over with.” Jester had to agree with that sentiment.

Jester’s groom kept staring at the ground. Master Ikthon grabbed his chin and lifted it up. “Posture.” The groom nodded and kept staring. Though his eyes were looking straight at her, it was as if he was looking through Jester.

The cleric began the ceremony. It was dry and super boring, and if Jester wasn’t about to be married, she would’ve just sat down on the ground. Her groom remained emotionless, but at least the fear was gone. “Jester Lavorre, do you take this man?”

Part of Jester was tempted to say no, but that would just ruin everything. “I do.”

“And do you, Bren Aldric Ermendrud, take this woman?”

Bren mouthed something, but no sound came out.

“He does. The boy was born mute,” Master Ikithon said.

A blush tinged Bren’s cheeks, but he nodded.

“Very well then.” The cleric cleared his throat. “By the power invested in me, I now declare you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”

Bren looked startled at this, but after a short moment leaned forward a gave her a quick peck on the lips. It was over almost before it began and Jester barely felt his lips. There was a hint of red on his cheeks as he pulled away from her.

“Now, that that’s taken care of, we must be on our way,” Master Ikithon said. There was already a whirl of business the mages began to leave.

“Wait!” Jester called out. Master Ikithon turned towards her a scowl carved on his face. “You still have Bren’s book.”

“And?”

Jester stood straight and put on her best bossy princess face. “And we want it back. It’s his book.”

Master Ikithon rolled his eyes and fished the book out of his robes. “Here.”

“Thank you,” Jester said sweetly as she plucked the book out of his hands.

Bren stared at her with a shocked look on his face. Jester passed him the book. He took it delicately and held it like it was a precious treasure.

“You’re welcome.” He hadn’t thanked her, but it felt right to say. A heavy silence hung between them. “So, we’re married now.”

Bren nodded.

Jester bit her lip. “I guess you’re going to be living with us in Nicodranas now.”

He nodded again.

“So you can write, right? That’d make this a lot easier,” Jester said. This time Bren shook his head. “But you can read?”

Bren held up the book and pointed at the title. It was all in a language Jester couldn’t understand.

“Is that Zemnian?”

Bren nodded.

Jester frowned. “So much for that.”

“Princess Jester,” some carriage guy said. “The carriage is ready.”

“Come on Bren,” Jester said taking his hand. “I’ll show which one’s mine. Or well ours.”

Bren stared at her, but dutifully followed Jester out to her bright pink carriage. He blinked at it several times.

“Isn’t it super cute?” Jester asked. “I chose the color myself.”

Bren mouthed something, but he was silent.

The carriage guy helped Jester into the carriage and then Bren after her. Once they were seated, Jester looked Bren over. He sat tightly against the wall. "You weren't born mute, were you?"

Bren blinked at her and straightened up shocked.

"You mouth words sometimes. If you were always mute, you probably wouldn't try to talk," Jester said. "So you probably used to talk, but can't anymore."

He nodded slowly and then picked up speed. Bren mouthed something again.

Jester frowned. "I wish I knew how to read lips. That's probably make things a lot easier for you."

With a shrug, Bren nodded once more.

"I'm a really good detective you know. I've solved all sorts of mysteries around the palace. I bet I can even find out why you're mute."

Bren scowled and shook his head. He drew even closer to the wall and opened his book. A sure sign that the conversation was over.

"Fine," Jester said pouting. "I wasn't that curious about you anyways." She had her own book that she could read, but the bumping of the carriage made her feel sick when she tried to read. So instead she whispered a short prayer of the Traveler to herself and stared out the window. This definitely wasn't what she expected her honeymoon to be like.

***

After a long afternoon in the carriage with the sullenly silent Bren, Jester was close to screaming. When Bren finished his book, Jester tried talking to him again, but he just pointely started it over. Jester was trying to be a good wife, but Bren was making it awfully difficult. Finally, the carriage slowed to a stop in front of an inn. She jumped out of the carriage not even waiting for the carriage guy to open the door for her.

"Your highness," the carriage guy said. "Please wait for me next time. I still need to arrange for your room."

Jester was tempted to roll her eyes, but instead she smiled sweetly. "Oh right."

Bren climbed out of the carriage much more sedately and stretched.

"It's good to get out of there," Jester said.

He nodded silently and put his book into his pocket.

"No more silent treatment?" Jester asked.

Bren gave her a shrug and a nod.

"For a mute guy, you sure have a lot to not say," Jester said. "Are you excited for Nicodranas?"

A shrug.

"You should be. It's a lot of fun and super pretty and there's the beach. Have you ever been to a beach?"

Bren shook his head.

Jester gasped. "Oh man, you are missing out. Swimming is super fun and there's crabs and you can build sand castles and at the end of the day, there's the sunset and it's beautiful. You'll love it."

Bren smiled softly.

"And the best part about Nicodranas is that it's where my mom is! I guess since we're married, she's kinda your mom too." Jester wasn't so sure that she liked the idea of sharing her mom. She already had to share her mom with the entire country as their queen, but her mom was her mom and that felt more private and personal.

Bren frowned slightly.

"Hey, my mom is super nice and you should consider yourself lucky,” Jester snapped.

Bren shook his head waving his hands in protest.

“That’s not what you were frowning about?”

He nodded.

Jester thought about what she had said. “Oh, you’re not happy to be married.” Bren looked away. “It’s okay. This is about duty not love.” She was hoping that her husband would at least like her, but it’s not like he wanted this anymore than she did.

Bren kept looking away but nodded once.

The carriage guy returned. Jester perked up. “Looks like we can go in now. Do you think they got dinner in there?”

Shrugging a shoulder, Bren nodded.

They followed the carriage guy into the inn and were brought to their room where a meal was laid out for them. Soon Jester and Bren were left alone to their meal. It wasn’t very fancy or tasty looking, but Jester had been too nervous to eat earlier, so she was willing to eat anything. Bren picked at his meal quietly.

“Is everything okay?” Jester asked.

Bren nodded but kept just poking his meal with his fork.

“Are you allergic? I could probably go downstairs and ask them to make you something different.” Jester started to stand, but Bren placed a hand on her arm shaking his head. Making a show of it, Bren took a big of his meal. He then tried to hide the look of disgust on his face as he swallowed it.

Jester giggled. “Oh, you just don’t like it. All the more reason to get you something else. I’ll be right back.”

Bren shook his head again.

“It won’t be a problem.” Jester paused. “Though I guess I don’t know what you do like. Maybe you can show me! Here!” Jester pulled her sketchbook out of her bag. “You can draw and show me what you like.”

Bren gave her a strange look taking a book and charcoal stick. Hunching over the page blocking it from Jester’s view, he drew.

Jester hovered about excited to see what her new husband would draw. Bren drew slowly his tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth. A furrow of concentration marked his brow. Finally he finished and presented Jester with the completed page. It was covered with a bunch of misshapened blobs.

“Oh, um right.” Jester stared at the page trying to figure out what it was supposed to be. “You like cookies?”

Bren looked at her, disappointment written on his face.

“No no, I was just joking. You like,” Jester stared at the page again, “bread?”

Bren nodded a bit more eagerly than Jester had seen him done before.

“Bread.” It was official; her husband was the most boring person ever. “I’ll go see if I can go get you some bread.”

Bren held up his hand like he was going to stop her, but he put it back down.

Jester hopped down the stairs and went to the kitchen. The owner of the inn was a woman older than Jester’s mom who was more than happy to give the princess a basket of rolls and half a loaf of bread. Having completed her task, Jester skipped back up the stairs and into her and Bren’s room.

Bren stared at her and then the bread in surprise.

"I told you that I'd get you bread and I did." Jester beamed. "Your wife is good on her word."

Bren rolled his eyes but took a roll and bit into it closing his eyes.

"Did I do good? It's still warm. That makes it better."

Bren nodded as he finished the roll. He then broke off a piece ofthe loaf and put some of his dinner on it.

Jester frowned. "But I thought you didn't like it? Why are you eating it."

He looked up at her with a frown. Bren opened his mouth like he wanted to say something and then closed it and shrugged.

"It's complicated?" Jester asked.

Bren nodded.

Jester groaned. Everything felt so much more complicated now and life used to be so simple. It wasn't that she expected being married to a stranger to be easy, but she had expected to at least be able to speak to her husband.

Finishing his meal, Bren got up with a stretch. Jester looked out the window. It had gotten dark outside their room. "I guess it's bedtime now isn't it." Her stomach churned at the thought of what she had to do next. It was only proper for them to 'finalize' their marriage, but that didn’t mean that she was eager for it.

Bren nodded and glanced at the bed. It wasn't particularly big. It could fit two people but it would be a tight fit. He took off his purple coat and instead of going to the bed, he went to the armchair. Curling up on the chair, Bren covered himself with the coat.

"Oh, you don't have to do that," Jester said. "I don't need that much space." Part of her really hoped that he’d let her take the bed, but she didn’t want to admit it out loud.

Her husband stared at her and then turned away trying to cover himself with his coat and doing a poor job of it.

Jester sighed taking the top blanket off the bed. "Here." She tucked the blanket around Bren. "There. I'd get too warm anyways."

Bren stared at her with those bright blue eyes of his. He mouthed something again and once again no sounds came out. The blue sparks of his necklace did look brighter, but that could've been the light.

"Goodnight Bren." Jester turned off the lights, said a prayer to the Traveler, and crawled into the bed. Bren's necklace gave off just enough light to make it not so bad to be in a strange dark room. The only sound in the room was Jester's own breath. She stared up at the ceiling. Her first night as a married woman and she was alone in her bed. She didn't know if she was disappointed or not.

* * *

Mama was so disappointed in Jester. "Couldn't you wait for me?"

"I tried," Jester said feeling small and dumb. "But the mages wouldn't let me."

"You only get married once and you wouldn't even wait for your mother." Mama turned away.

Jester clenched her fists to her side. "I really did try. I wanted you there."

"If you really wanted me there, you would've done something."

Tears welled up in Jester's eyes. "Mama. I-"

Mama kept her back turned to her. "Save it. I just thought you loved me."

Jester tried to say something but it was like her throat was filled with black tar. The floor sunk down beneath her and Jester found herself in a cage. A fearsome tiger was trapped in there too and stalked around her, flicking its tail about. Piercing blue eyes glowed staring right through her. Bren's eyes.

"No!" Jester cried out flailing around. Something was tied up all around her and she was tangled up. A hand grabbed her and she swung a fist at whoever it was attached to. She made contact with something and then she opened her eyes. Jester wasn't in a cage but the room at the inn. Bren's necklace glowed by her and she noticed that it was the sheets that were tangled around her. Only then did she realize who she must’ve hit. "Oh, did I hit you?" Jester asked.

There was a shift to Bren's necklace, but Jester couldn't really see him.

"I'm sorry. It was a nightmare. I shouldn't have hit you." Jester unwrapped the blankets around her.

The bed shifted under her and Bren must've sat down next to her. He grabbed her hand and quietly held it.

“It’s just that my mom wasn’t at the wedding and in my dream she was so mad at me and I didn’t want her to miss it and then I was in a cage with a tiger. I just wished that she’d been there. Not in the cage with the tiger, but at the wedding, I mean.” Jester slumped down. “And I know I shouldn’t complain to you; your parents weren’t there either. I mean unless that Ikithon guy’s your dad.”

Bren shook his head so hard Jester could see his necklace move.

“Yeah, I wouldn’t want him to be my dad either.” True, Jester didn’t know who her father was, but she knew that her mom’s standards were too high for Ikithon. She drew her knees to her chest wrapping an arm around them while her other one still held Bren’s hand. “Do you miss your parents?”

Bren squeezed her hand tightly.

“Will I get to meet them?”

Bren’s grip loosened.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I wasn’t lying earlier. If you want, my mom can be your mom too. I think she’d like you. She’s super nice and understanding.” The thought sharing her mom didn’t hurt as much now that she knew Bren couldn’t have his anymore. Jester sighed.”I know I’m going to see her super soon, but I still miss her you know?”

Bren snapped his fingers and flinched away from Jester.

“Are you okay?” Jester got up and lit a lamp.

Bren had slipped down to the ground pale and shaking. He held his head in his hands and looked sick.

She pressed a hand to his forehead and he was burning up. “Oh! You’ve got a fever! I’ll go get someone to help you.”

He grabbed her hand with both of his shaking his head hard.

“But you’re sick.”

Bren mouthed something that looked like ‘please’.

Jester bit her lip. She didn’t know if there was even anyone there that could help him anyways. There were tales in Nicodranas of priestess queens blessed by the gods with great powers of healing, but those were from myths of long ago and Jester certainly wasn’t one. Most people said that the Traveler, Jester’s god, barely counted as one. “Well, okay, but you take the bed this time.”

Smiling weakly, Bren nodded. Jester helped him into the bed and tucked him in earning rolled eyes.

“Don’t give me that,” Jester said crossing her arms. “You’re sick, so it’s my job to take care of you.”

Bren shook his head.

“Yes it is, as your wife and your friend, it’s my job,” Jester said.

Bren seemed shocked for a moment and mouthed a single word.

“Yeah, we’re friends. Or at least I hope we can be.” Jester could feel her cheeks warm with a blush. “But we don’t have to be if you don’t want to. It’s up to you.”

Grabbing her hand, Bren nodded and mouthed ‘friends’ again.

Jester grinned and giggled. “Friends! But we have to make it official. Like a deal or a ceremony.” She clapped her hands. “A ceremony! It will be so much fun. Wait, can we wait for it?”

Bren tilted his head to the side in confusion.

“Well, I was kinda thinking maybe my mom could be there, you know, since she wasn’t there for the wedding. But that would just give us more time to get ready for it and the wedding was just kinda thrown at us.”

He nodded with a shrug.

“It will be so much fun.” Jester grinned brightly. “We can dress all fancy and get a giant cake and invite all our friends."

Bren sunk down and frowned.

"What's the matter?" Jester asked. "There's plenty of room at the palace and you can invite your friends to visit and ... they're probably all mages and not allowed in Nicodranas." Despite the peace treaty the country was still deeply suspicious of mages and barely any were allowed in the country. Bren would be the second one that Jester was aware of.

Bren nodded with a distant look on his face.

"So we'll need to help you make a bunch of new friends and you can write letters to your old friends. Do they read zemnian?"

Bren hesitated nodded again.

"Great! Cause like otherwise, your letters would just look like a bunch of random letters to them," Jester said with a grin.

Bren covered his mouth like he was chuckling but still no sound came out. The sparks on his necklace grew brighter.

Jester frowned. It just didn't make sense. The necklace was just supposed to stop magic. "Bren?" Jester asked cautiously. "Can you cough for me?"

He gave her a quizzical look and coughed for her. Not a sound could be heard and his necklace grew ever so slightly brighter.

"It doesn't just stop magic, it stops sounds too," Jester said thinking out loud.

Bren looked away sharply, but after a moment he nodded hesitantly.

Jester grabbed the two sides of the necklace barely thinking before acting and pulled with all her strength. The metal glowed under her hands and burned with in white hot pain. Spots danced before Jester's eyes, but she kept pulling. Bren grabbed her wrists tugging at them trying to get her to stop, but she ignored him. Whispering a prayer to the Traveler, Jester gave one last mighty pull and managed to snap the necklace in two. Sparks burned through the burns showering the two of them. She threw the two hunks of metal aside. Blisters were forming on her hands, but she didn't care.

"What were you thinking?!" Bren demanded. He voice was thick from hoarseness and a heavy zemnian accent. "You had no idea what that was or what could've happened if you touched it let alone break it." Bren took Jester's hands. "You shouldn't get hurt over me."

“Cause everyone has the right to be heard. It wasn’t fair for them to make you mute like that.”

Bren sighed. “It was my fate. I agreed to it. It was the only way for a mage to be considered safe.”

“But it was hurting you, wasn’t it?” Jester asked. “It’s what suddenly made you sick right?”

Bren stared at her for a moment and then chuckled. It sounded like a rusted gate gate. She had a feeling he didn’t laugh much. “You’re a lot more clever than anyone has given you credit for. That ‘illness’ was what I get for forgetting and trying to cast a spell.”

Jester went cold. “A spell?”

“Ja, a spell. It’s what mages do. We cast spells,” Bren said.

“Oh,” Jester said. “What kind of spell were you trying to cast?”

Bren opened his mouth and then closed it. “It’d be easier to show you. May I cast a spell?”

The idea of it made Jester’s stomach churn, but there was something in Bren’s eyes(was it mischief?) that made her trust him. “Okay,” she said as firmly as she could.

“Ja, okay then.” Bren snapped his fingers and then there was an orange striped cat on Jester’s lap. It blinked up at her and purred.

Jester gasped. “This was what you were trying to do? But I thought that magic could just do bad things and stuff.”

“Don’t be mistake, mages cannot be trusted. Especially me. But magic do good things,” Bren said. “Like bring Frumpkin to us.”

“Who’s a good magic cat, Frumpkin?” Jester asked. “You is.” She booped Frumpkin’s nose. “But why were summoning her?”

“Him actually. And he’s a lot better comfort than I, even when I can talk. And, well, you needed comfort.”

Jester looked up from Frumpkin. “I think you’re a lot better friend than you give yourself credit for, Bren.”

“That’s not my name, not anymore. It’s Caleb. Caleb Widogast.” Bren, no, Caleb paused. “Though I suppose it’s Caleb Lavorre now.”

“Caleb. That’s a nice name,” Jester said. She scratched Frumpkin behind his ears. “So, um, why were you chosen to marry me?”

Caleb smiled, but it was cold smile dark and distant. “Because I’m the one they’d miss the least.”

Jester frowned. “You shouldn’t say stuff like that. They probably picked you cause you’re very handsome and even if you’re a little weird you’re also sweet worrying about me. And I’m sure that there’s people who miss you a ton like your parents.”

“My parents.” Caleb frowned looking out the window.

“They are okay, right? Even if they’re mages, I bet my mom would be okay with them coming to Nicodranas,” Jester said.

Caleb sighed and Frumpkin walked over to him. “Jester, that’s very kind of you, but,” he sighed loudly, “they’re dead.”

“Oh Caleb, I’m so sorry.”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Caleb said. “It wasn’t anyone’s fault.” There was something in the way he said it that suggested that Caleb didn’t believe that, but Jester wasn’t going to press him on the subject.

Jester felt like she should still say something, but nothing came to mind. “Maybe you should get some more sleep.”

“Not without checking your hands first.” Caleb sat up and grabbed her hands. Jester winced. The blisters on her hands were hot and white. “I have no talent when it comes to healing, but I know a few things about burns.” He took two handkerchiefs out of his coat pocket and dipped them into the water jug next to the bed. “This might sting a little.” But it didn’t. It was cool against Jester’s skin. “Keep this on until the pain eases. I don’t have any lotions or ointments, so this will have to do for now.”

“It’s feeling better already,” Jester said.

Caleb smiled at her slightly and removed his shirt and undershirt. He was thin, too thin. Jester could see the hints of bones under his skin. Taking the undershirt, Caleb tore long strips out of it. “This will have to do for bandage. Let me see your hands again.” It felt different to give him her hands while he was topless. His hands were warm and nimble as he bandaged both her hands. “There. Now promise me you won’t go messing with magical items you know nothing about.”

“But what if it’s hurting you?” Jester asked.

Caleb sighed. “Especially if it’s hurting me. I can’t have you getting yourself hurt over me.”

“Why not?”

Another sigh. “Despite this marriage being against our wills, I still feel an obligation towards you.”

Jester drooped a little. This was a political marriage nothing more nothing less. They could play at being friends, but that didn’t change the truth. “But that means I have an obligation for you too.”

Caleb chuckled. "I suppose so, but remember you have an even bigger obligation to nicodranas. Your people rely on you."

"And people rely on you too," Jester said.

"What makes you think that?" Caleb asked.

"Well, cause you were willing to let them collar you to ensure the peace treaty. I don't think there's a lot of people would agree to that. It's very brave of you Caleb." Jester grinned at him. "So I think a lot of people in Rexxentrum are counting on you." She paused and gasped. "And you're supposed to still have the collar on. If anyone knows that you took it off-"

Caleb gave her a glance. "I believe you mean you took it off."

"We took it off, there's going to be a lot of trouble. So," Jester clapped her hands, "we'll make a fake collar. I just need to get some clay and paints, and no one will be able to tell the difference."

"Or I could just wear my scarf around my neck and just hide it. I don’t think anyone would blame me for not wanting to display it.”

Jester was a little disappointed that she wouldn’t be able to show off her amazing art skills, but Caleb’s idea was much simpler. “Or we could do that. We might want to wait until she knows you better before we explain it to Mom, but she’d totally understand. I don’t think she’d want to see you suffer either.”

“I was just doing my-” Caleb paused and pensively stared out the window, “duty.”

“You keep doing that,” Jester pointed out. “You stop talking and stare outside. What’s out there?”

Caleb’s face reddened. “Nothing. Common’s hardly my first language. It takes me time to remember words.”

“I wasn’t teasing or anything. Just wondering. Was it a big duty?” Jester couldn’t help but ask.

“Enormous,” he said flatly, but there was a hint of a grin on his face.

Jester giggled and then yawned.

Caleb moved to get up. “Here, you can have the bed.”

“But you’re still sick.” Jester pressed the back of her hand to his forehead. It was cooler than it was earlier, but it was still unnaturally warm. “You get the bed.”

“It’s too big for me,” Caleb said. “Look at me.” He held a thin arm. “I’m so thin I’d get lost in here. The chair is more my size.”

“We could share the bed,” Jester said her face growing hot at just suggesting it. They were married so really it shouldn’t have bothered her, but sharing a bed with someone was so intimate.

Caleb turn beet red. “The bed? You don’t have to trouble yourself for my sake.”

“But, I need to keep an eye on you. To make sure your fever doesn’t come back,” Jester said. “And you to make sure that my hands are okay too, right? So it makes sense to share the bed.”

Caleb frowned at first, but nodded. “Fine then, but if I make you uncomfortable, push me out of the bed.”

Jester snickered. “Ok and you have permission to push me out too.”

“Ja, okay,” Caleb said with a chuckle.

Jester climbed into the bed next to him. He was warm next to her. “Goodnight Caleb.”

“Goodnight Jester.”

Caleb was faster at falling asleep than Jester was, and soon the sound his soft breathing filled the room. It was both like and unlike listening to the tide. She was surprised by how much she liked it.

* * *

Jester woke up to a small goblin screaming and pointing a crossbow at her. It was not how Jester expected to wake up the first day of her honeymoon. But nothing was going the way Jester had expected it to.

“AAHHHHH!!! What are you doing to Caleb?!!!” the goblin screamed.

It took Jester a moment to fully realize where she was. They were still at the inn and Caleb was still in bed with her. To be more accurate, Caleb was wrapped around Jester. The goblin stood over them glaring down at Jester.

“I’m not doing anything,” Jester said her eyes not leaving the crossbow aimed at her.

The goblin rolled her eyes. “A likely story,” the goblin said. “If you’ve harmed a single hair on my boy’s head, I’ll-”

“Nott?” Caleb said slowly getting up. “What are you doing here?”

"Caleb!" The goblin launched herself into Caleb's arms. "You're okay! Wait, you talked!"

Caleb nodded holdingthe goblin in a hug. "Ja, I did. Jester removed my collar."

"I thought you were just mute. I could have freed you sooner," Nott said.

"I didn't want you to free me. I didn't want her to free me either," Caleb said with a sigh.

Jester bit her lip. "But why would you want to keep that thing on?"

"It's my punishment," Caleb said simply.

"Caleb," Nott said sternly holding his face in both of her hands, "you are a smart person and deserve all the nice things. How many more times do I have to tell you this?"

Caleb held up a finger. "One more."

"How do you know each other?" Jester asked. They seemed like an odd couple, but they were obviously very close.

"I found Caleb a year ago," Nott said. "And we've been traveling together ever since. Well, up until the mages took him. But I tracked them down and found out where they sent you." She smiled fondly at Caleb. Then Nott turned her attention to Jester and her mood was notably colder. "You two seem awfully close. Who are you?"

Caleb sighed with more than a hint of dread. "Nott, this is Jester Lavorre, my wife."

"Wife!! You were gone for two weeks and you already have a wife!" Nott sounded wounded.

"It wasn't entirely my choice. It's complicated," Caleb said ducking his head down.

"If it helps at all, my mom couldn’t be there for the wedding either,” Jester said. Nott had called Caleb her boy, so maybe they were some sort of family too. “But we’re going to have a friendship ceremony in Nicodranas and you should totally come to it.”

Nott shook her head sending her lank dark hair flying about. ”No, you can’t go there. I overheard the mages while trying to find where you were, and they’ve got a plan to restart the war on their terms.”

“But they were the ones that proposed the peace treaty in the first place,” Jester said. “Why would they do that if they’re just going to start the war again?”

“To catch Nicodranas by surprise most likely. That sounds more like Master Ikithon than actually brokering peace does,” Caleb said.

A knock came at the door. “I’ll take care of it,” Jester said getting up.

“So we should go back north before some Nicodranian princess gets assassinated,” Nott said. “Her death will be the lynchpin or something.”

Jester froze, the door halfway open. Her heart almost stopped. Assassinated? Her blood went cold.

The door was pushed open. “Pardon me, ma’am,” said a young servant carrying a large tray. “Got your breakfast right here.”

“Oh, thank you,” Jester said numbly. Her mind was still reeling from the possibility of someone wanting to assassinate her.

“Danke,” Caleb said. Nott was nowhere to be seen.

The servant’s eyes narrowed into a cold glare at Caleb. “You’re supposed to be silent.”

“Jester, get back!” Caleb shouted. The servant dropped his tray and his disguise. The dark haired mage that Jester had seen with Caleb the day before stood in front of her. He was even bigger and more intimidating so close up. “Eodwulf,” Caleb gasped softly. A cruel blade appeared in Eodwulf’s hand out of nowhere and he brought it down aiming for Jester’shead.

Jester stared at it too shocked to move. A shimmer appeared before her, and the sword stopped inches away from her face like shield had stopped it. Jester’s knees gave out from beneath her. Caleb stepped forward.”I don’t know what you or Master Ikithon are playing at, but it stops now,” he said.

Eodwulf scoffed. “A coward like always I see. We were hoping that you would have the sense to be silent and die.” He fired a blast of something hitting Caleb squarely in the shoulder.

Caleb cried out in pain but kept standing. “You know me better than that. I’ve never had the sense to do what I should.” He threw a firebolt at Eodwulf, but it missed him by half a foot.”

“You didn’t keep up with your practices did you?” Eodwolf asked chuckling. All of his attention was on Caleb ignoring Jester.

Scrambling for something, anything to help Caleb, Jester grabbed the tray Eodwolf had been carrying earlier and bashed it against his knee. Eodwulf cursed loudly and grabbed Jester by the neck.

“No!” Caleb shouted. “Let go of her!”

“Do you actually care for her?” Eodwolf tightened his grip around Jester’s throat and spots grew in front of her eyes. “You’re softer than I thought. Tell you what, I’ll let her go if you use a fireball on me. Though you’ll hit her too, won’t you?””

“You monster!” Caleb spat out.

Eodwulf laughed. “You’re just as much of a monster as I am. After all, you are the one who set his parents on fire and listened to their cries doing nothing.”

“Shut up,” Caleb said, but it was barely a whisper. “I, I, it was a mistake. I didn’t mean to - I didn’t think.”

Eodwulf dropped Jester onto the ground and she drew in a gasp of air. He drew his sword and slashed Caleb threw the chest. Blood sprayed out covering the floor and Jester.

Caleb dropped to his hands and knees, blood pouring from his wound. He looked at Jester, his eyes full of fear. Blood running out of his mouth, he mouthed something and collapsed.

“Caleb!!!” A shrill voice screamed out and Jester almost thought that it came from herself, but then a crossbow popped out from behind the bed and two crossbow bolts appeared in Eodwulf’s throat. He tried to grab atthem, but then a third bolt joined them. With a gurgling gasp, Eodwulf sunk down to his knees and then fell over on the ground.

Jester hurried over to Caleb’s side and turned him over. His eyes stared ahead at nothing and Jester couldn’t find a pulse.

Caleb was dead.

Nott dropped down to her knees next to him. “No, no,” she whispered over and over again. “I can’t lose him.”

Tears ran down Jester’s cheeks as she held his hand. Caleb saved her. He didn’t have to, but he did. “Traveler,” Jester prayed, “please help him. I know he’s dead, but people undie sometimes, right? So maybe Caleb could be one of those exceptions? Like, I know I just met him and stuff, but I don’t think I’m ready to lose him yet. He’s my friend. Oh and technically my husband.” She finished her prayer, not certain that it would work.

“Oh, this is interesting,” a soft lilting voice said in Jester’s ear. She looked around, but no one was there. “I’ve heard of your line. I’m not one that holds much stock in holy blood, but you and your, hmm, boy have piqued my interest. I’ll grant you this boon, but I’ll need you to spread my word.”

"Of course," Jester said barely believing her ears. "I already do."

A soft chuckle brushed her ear. "I know. Keep it up."

Caleb gasped and sat up. There was still blood all over him, but the gash on his chest was gone. "Caleb!" Nott shouted wrapping him in a tight hug.

“What happened? Where’s Jester?” Caleb asked looking around the room frantically until his eyes fell upon Jester. He smiled faintly but it faded quickly. “I’ll be leaving soon.”

“Why?” Jester asked. “Is something wrong?”

He gave her a painful forlorn look. “Eodwulf wasn’t lying. I killed my parents. You don’t deserve to be attached to such a monster.”

Jester shook her head. “That can’t be right. You miss them so much, and I know you weren’t lying.”

“I do miss them, but I was the one responsible for my parents’ deaths,” Caleb said.

"Oh Caleb," Nott said softly.

Caleb began his sad tale of potential and manipulation. Of how he was chosen for the best magic school in Rexxentrum and the torture he received at the hands of Master Ikithon. Jester’s heart sunk more and more as Caleb revealed the inhumane actions of the lead mages of Rexxentrum. “I was the first of my family to become a mage. It was supposed to be a great honor. My parents were so proud. Before I was to graduate with my friends, Master Ikithon took us aside. It turned out there was a steep price to magehood. A mage line must start fresh removing all lack of magic.”

“Remove all lack of magic?” Jester asked.

“Disposing, no, killing our families,” Caleb said. “If we didn’t, we’d have to wear the silencing collars,” he rubbed his neck, “a fate all mages dread. The blow was lightened by the news of our parents betraying Rexxentrum. So we all agreed.”

Caleb stared down at his hands. “I went last. We blocked the door to the house with a cart and I lit the house on fire. And I was so certain. So certain that it was right, that it was worth. And then I heard the screams of my parents. And then I broke.

“I was sent to an asylum and fitted with a silencing collar. I spent 11 years there. And then I met Nott,” Caleb said. “She got me out of there.”

Nott blushed ducking down her head. “I didn’t really do anything. I was there looking for something and I found Caleb while checking the rooms. He just followed me out.”

Caleb smiled fondly at Nott. “There’s more to it than that. Nott, you helped me get better. And it’s far more than I deserved after all I’ve done.”

“You were only a boy,” Nott said. "It wasn't your fault."

"You're opinion of me is too high," Caleb said. "It's more than I deserve, but I'm not strong enough to leave your side. The worst of it was that I learned that it wasn't even true. Master Ikithon planted memories of my parents committing treason in my mind. They were innocent and I was a monster who killed them."

Nott wrapped him in a gentle hug and it felt like Jester was intruding on a private moment. Jester turned away from them as Nott whispered comforting words into his hair.

"What are you going to do now?" Jester asked once Nott let go of Caleb.

Caleb shrugged. "I don't know. I won't bother you anymore if that's what you wish. I only agreed to marry you after the mages captured me because they promised that no harm would come to Nott if I did. You deserve more of a husband than that."

Jester bit her lip. Logic told her that she should just make him leave. The marriage probably wouldn't hold up if it was revealed that the mages tried to kill her, and then Jester would be free to marry whoever she pleased. But she also knew that Caleb was hurt and that the mages would hunt him down if he was on his own. She wouldn't forgive herself for turning him away. "You can stay," she said. "I need more than just my word for accusing Master Ikithon of ordering my death. If a mage and one trusted enough to be my husband were to second my report, then they’d have to listen."

"I'll testify for you, but if you wish to annul the marriage," Caleb said, "I'll understand."

Jester shook her head. "No, I think that our union will still hold weight and will give Nicodranas an edge to future treaties. Besides, are you saying that you don't want to be friends anymore?" Jester said pouting.

"Your friendship is much more than I deserve. The rumors paint you as being flighty, but your kindness is the heaviest I've ever seen," Caleb said.

"That was a compliment," Nott added. "Caleb is a good boy. You can trust him."

Jester nodded. "I do." Even though they only knew each other for barely a day, she found that it was true. Except for her mom, there was maybe only a couple of people she trusted more than him. He had died for her and she wasn't one to take such sacrifices lightly.

Nott smiled at Jester showing all her sharp crooked teeth. "You won't regret this."

"I know," Jester said.

Caleb looked like he didn't believe it or like he couldn't believe it. "Can Nott join us?"

Jester grinned. "Sure! A friend of yours is a friend of mine. But she doesn't get to join our friendship ceremony, she can only watch. It's private."

Caleb snorted a laugh.

Nott stared at him dumbfounded. "Caleb, you laughed. Jester, I don’t know what you did to him, but keep it up."

* * *

The next three weeks included travel, travel, and more travel. Jester would've been bored out of her mind if it weren't for Caleb and Nott. And the Traveler. The god made a point to spend time with his new priestess.

After their journey started again, Caleb was so quiet most of the time that Jester forgot that he could talk now, but he'd sometimes be open to conversation. Usually though, he was willing to just listen to Jester and Nott talk with a quiet smile on his face.

Nott was definitely not mute. She'd tell Jester all about her and Caleb's adventures during the time they were together and about the different collections she has stolen over time. Not only that, but she was very clever, and she and Jester would have their own adventures and were on their way to being the greatest detective anyone had ever seen.

The Traveler would come before Jester went to sleep each night. Sometimes he'd just whisper a word to her and other times he'd talk with her for hours keeping up all night. They'd talk about pranks and spreading his word and of all the great things they would do together.

Soon they were finally rumbling down the streets of Nicodranas. Nott stared out the window with wide eyes and could scarcely take it all in. Jester could hardly stay still for the excitement of finally being home. Meanwhile, Caleb was even quieter than usual sinking into his chair as much as possible.

"Is that the ocean?" Nott asked.

"Yeah!" Jester said. "It's really cool and wait until you see the sunsets."

Nott stuck out her tongue. "I'll pass. Remember where the ocean is Caleb. Water is the most likely thing to kill you."

"I don't think that's quite right," Jester said.

"No no, water's a genuine killer and all encounters with it has an 85% chance of killing you," Nott said.

Usually those sort of comments would get a chuckle or half a smile from Caleb, but instead he remained silent.

"Are you okay, Caleb?" Jester asked."Do you need to poop?"

"Nein," Caleb said shaking his head. "I'm fine."

Jester pouted. "The frown on your face says otherwise. You're in your new home. Aren't you excited?"

"Ja, it's exciting," Caleb said flatly.

Nott pressed her hand to Caleb's forehead. "Are you sure you're not sick?"

"I'm fine." He sighed. "Are you sure I'm not going to be just thrown in jail?"

Jester stared at him. Why would he think that?

Nott tutted. "If they tried, I'd just break you out."

"We wouldn't. If Mom tried to, I'd fight her. But we don't jail people here for doing nothing," Jester said.

"I was part of a plot to murder you," Caleb pointed out.

Jester snorted. "Technically, you didn't know that it was a murder plot and it was kinda against your will. Besides you saved me, so really you're my hero."

Caleb's cheeks turned red. "If you say so."

"She does and she's right. You're very brave smart and handsome," Nott said.

Caleb managed to find a way to turn even redder.

“See? It’s going to be okay.” Jester placed a hand on Caleb’s knee.

He sputtered for a moment. “Ja, uh, danke.”

The carriage slowed to a stop and the door opened. They were at the palace. Jester grabbed Caleb’s hand leading him out of the carriage. “Come on, let’s go.”

* * *

Caleb followed closely behind Jester. The palace was so grand and beautiful, Caleb felt like a dirty stain just walking through it. Jester belonged there though. She was born for grandeur and beauty. And to make dick jokes.

Jester pointed out various things to Caleb and Nott as they went through the halls of the palace telling them all sorts of stories. Caleb questioned how true some of them were, but the excitement Jester told them with was the most charming thing Caleb had ever seen.

But a frown remained carved on caleb's face. He couldn't get himself to calm down. His mind worried and raced . In just minutes, he was going to meet Queen Marion Lavorre, the queen of his people's enemy. There was no way that he would be welcomed there.

It was one thing when he still had his silencing collar. He was safe, harmless, but now he was a mage with full access to his powers. there was no way that the queen would allow him to even breathe the same air as Jester once she knew. The guards escorting them stop in front of a pair of imposing doors. Jester hurried ahead throwing the doors open. "Mama!" She bounded through the throne room completely ignoring the courtiers and everyone in the room and threw herself at the woman seated upon an elegant and intimidating throne. The woman wrapped Jester in a tight hug.

"My little sapphire!" The woman, the queen, held onto Jester for a long moment before letting her go. "Are you safe how was your journey? I've received messages about your treaty meeting." Her face fell painted with anxiety. "Is he here?" There was a clear note of concern emphasizing ‘he’.

Jester pointed at Caleb and waved him to come forward. "This Caleb, Mama. He’s very kind to me.”

Blushing, Caleb came forward Nott following closely in his shadow. Jester’s praise was too good for him. He stopped ten feet away from the throne and dropped to the ground kneeling his bowed down low. “Your Majesty.” Even to his own ears, his voice was rough and common. Clearly, he was unworthy to be in the queen’s presence.

“Oh! And he saved my life!” Jester went into the tale. It was accurate except for how gallant and brave she painted Caleb. He was doing what he had to. If they weren't trapped in the room, he probably would've just tried to grab and Jester and Nott and run. Caleb was neither brave nor good, but Jester thought he was, and the last thing he ever wanted to do was disappoint her.

Jester also went on about the Traveler and how he saved Caleb. Caleb wasn’t sure what he thought about the Traveler, but the god made Jester happy, so Caleb had no complaints about him.

Queen Marion clutched her chest when Jester finished. "And you're okay?"

"Yes Mama, thanks to Caleb," Jester said. It was then Caleb realized what she was doing. Trying to paint him as better than he was so that the queen wouldn't banish him out of hand. It wasn't going to work, but Caleb was grateful that she cared so much. Though she probably would've done that for anyone.

"Then I owe him a great boon," the queen said. "Stand up. There's no reason for you to grovel so."

Caleb stood up but he kept his head bowed. "I'm owed nothing. Your majesty. I'm one of the mages. They used me as part of their plot. I'm not the brave hero that your daughter has set me to be."

"If you are neither brave or a hero, then your service is even greater than I had realized." There was a shift of movement and soon the gown of the queen filled Caleb's view. "Let me see your face." Caleb looked up and there was a kind smile on her red face. "My, how handsome you are. I'm lucky that such a man was chosen for my daughter even if it was to be part of a trap. They didn't know what they had in their hands."

"Your majesty is too kind," Caleb said. She was the most beautiful woman in the world, but he preferred to look at Jester. "I will accept any punishment that you feel fit for me for my part of it, though. I am not worthy of yours or Jester's praise."

The Queen tilted her head a little and there was soft understanding in her smile. "Oh, I believe having me as a mother-in-law should be punishment enough. You will find that there's nothing I wouldn't do for my little sapphire."

"Mama," Jester whined, but there was a hint of a giggle to her voice.

"What? It's true. And you helped stop me from losing her and Nicodranas from losing its future queen and priestess." The Queen sounded particularly proud of this. "Such a deed can not be ignored. Any boon you wish will be yours."

Caleb stared at her barely believing her. "Any boon?"

The Queen nodded.

"Can my friend Nott stay here? She's not too much trouble." A slight lie on Caleb's part, but considering that this was Jester's mother he was speaking to, she was probably used to a little trouble. "Please."

Nott gasped from behind Caleb."Are you sure, Cay? There's better things you could ask for." But Caleb couldn't imagine anything greater than keeping Nott at his side.

"Of course, she's staying," Jester said. "That's not even a boon or a gift. Nott's super cool, Mom. You're going to love her. Oh and Caleb."

The queen looked over Caleb's shoulder at Nott and chuckled. "I already do." Her smile then faded to a frown. "We'll need to prepare for the mages next move. It's unlikely that they don't have more planned or haven't moved to their nextstep. Will you assist us us?" she asked Caleb.

"They told me nothing of their plans, but I can tell you what I know of them."Caleb looked away for a brief moment and then returned his eyes to the queen making eye contact. "You must know that the people of Rexxentrum do not deserve punishment for the mages and the actions of their circle."

"You are full of surprises," the queen said. "We will keep that in mind while working on our plans."

"Thank you," Caleb said bowing his head.

Jester grinned at him and then led him out of the throne room. She then threw her arms around him. "I told you that my mom's the best!"

"Ja, you were right," Caleb said. But the truth was Jester was the best.

* * *

_One Month Later_

They were gathered in a smaller room with a couple of tables covered with all sorts of desserts. It was a private meeting of sorts, just Jester and Caleb and a few friends including Jester's mom and Nott. Jester cleared her throat. "Thank you all for gathering here today. As most of you know, you missed our wedding and that just sucks. So, Caleb," she squeezed his hand, " and I have decided to invite you all to our friendship union."

"I still don't know what a friendship union is," someone muttered in the back. It might've been Beau, Jester's favorite librarian.

Jester chose to ignore the comment and continue on with the ceremony. "Friends come in all sorts of sizes, from small," she waved at Nott, “to large," she gestured to the large gardener who always helped her talk to the bees. "But there is always room for more friends. Which is why I've decided to officially make Caleb, my husband, my friend." Picking up a miniscule blueberry streusel tart, Jester shoved it into Caleb's face getting most of it into his mouth.

Caleb's face turned the cutest shade of red as he wiped the apple filling off of the corner of his mouth. "I, um. For the longest time, it was just me, and then me and Nott. And I'm honored to be counted as Jester Lavorre's friend to count her as one of mine." He grabbed miniature black moss cupcake and popped it into Jester's mouth more careful than Jester was. Before she could finish her cupcake, Caleb ducked in close and kissed her. It wasn't their first kiss or even their second, but it took her by surprise.

"Uh, help yourselves to desserts," Jester said certain that her cheeks were a bright purple. There was a slight smirk to Caleb's face as Jester tried to compose herself better. But two could play that game, Jester thought as she kissed him back. Maybe this marriage wasn't what she expected, but maybe it was even better than anything she could imagine.

**Author's Note:**

> So, I had this idea for a few weeks, but kept going 'nah, no one would like the idea of silencing collar. It probably doesn't make sense to anyone but me anyways.' And then episode 81 happened and it was like Matthew Mercer was giving me the go ahead for this fic.
> 
> A big thanks for Kiley who helped me work this some rough spots and convince me that yes this is good. ...and for confirming that the violence was surprising coming for me.


End file.
